This slightly changed line of the hit “Free your mind” gave me the inspiration to write this article.
In my previous article “The number one killer of your career happiness” I wrote about our inner critic. So now it is high time to write a kick-ass article about the other more positive part of our inner self. The part that stands on the other side of our inner critic, which is our inner free child.
My own free child often comes out to play at night mostly. It is often after a long and busy day that my inner critic goes to sleep and my free child can finally show herself. My free child always has very crazy, bold and creative ideas related to my business. It is thanks to her voice that I have written my book, conceived many different articles, created workshops, started thinking on creating events etc. When my free child is on the loose ‘the sky is the limit’. It often happens that on nights like that I am awake till 3 – 4 am, but the outcome is amazing.
Recently I have started a newer, healthier way to let my inner child speak. I am now able to give space to my free child during meditations and guided visualizations. During those moments miracles happen.
So what is this voice, the inner free child?
According to Eric Berne, a Canadian psychiatrist and psychotherapist, who created a theory called Transactional Analysis, the free child is our ego-state in which we feel and act like we used to when we were small.
It is a state in which we are free of fear, for example for what others will think of us. It is in these moments when we can be truly creative. When we are sad we cry, when we are happy we laugh, when we are angry we scream.
It is also this part of us, which has been with us from the moment we were born. It is the part which first senses and than reacts without judging if the reaction is ‘right’ or ‘wrong’. It is therefore a part in us, which is not being bothered or restricted by rules or consequences.
When I do the exercise with my clients to identify their free child, they often say things like:
“When I am in my free child I feel alive”
‘When I am in my free child I don’t give a damn what he or she will say”
“My free child wants me to quit my job and start my own business”
“My free child wants me to live on a tropical island”
“My free child wants me to move to Africa and help children”
“My free child wants me to become a coach, a photographer, a social activist”
“My free child wants me to move to Italy and run my own B&B”
“My free child wants me to stand on a podium and change the lives of thousands of people”
“My free child wants me to become a yoga teacher and live on Bali”
And so on and so on.
Do you recognize this voice?
Artists and creative persons have an easy access to this part of themselves. Without it they cannot create. But those of us who come from a corporate environment are often less prone to use this part of our inner world.
Why you have to create relationship with your inner free child?
- All the dreams of what we want to do and become are conceived by our free child
- Without our free child our lives will be lacking joy and fulfillment
- All creative work is conceived by our free child
- Expressing freely our emotions will improve our emotional health
How to make a connection and develop a lasting relationship with your free child?
- By observing children, we learn that a free child is out there during play time – so go out and play! You can do sport, run, play in the sand, do crazy stuff like kids do.
- Free child comes out when we leave our mind in peace – so meditate, do visualizations, daydream, listen to the music without doing anything else.
- Free child loves nature – so go for a walk in the forest, walk on beach, make contact with whatever type of nature you love most.